Wednesday, April 18, 2012

me & the mindset.

So I've been getting more feedback on my personal posts then I had expected. Maybe instead of thinking of it as a way to snoop isn't right afterall, it's a way to introduce myself and explain who I am.
I feel right now in life (and a huge mistake amongst others of the past) my biggest flaw is holding back from going after things that'll bring me Closer to my dreams and goals. A sense of achievement is a feeling that has decreased yearly the past 5 years. I'm not in school and I have trouble keeping a job. When I go to work I'm a hard working employee. I never get fired, I just wake up and decide I don't want to go in, I call out and if it's not accepted or I feel like somebody's goin to be mad at me- scared of confrontation - I never return. Why do I do it? Well the answer is actually quite complex. Its taken me years and years of thinking and examining myself and actions to figure out the answer to my question. *why can't I function like a normal human being?* although I'm still working on the solution. I've figured out the problem. I live through and act on my emotions. After reading a book called mindset by carol dweck I was informed that I have a fixed mindset (vs the growth mindset). One of the biggest factors in the fixed mindset is acting through emotions. In the fixed mindset- if you experience an emotional breakdown or an emotional emergency, your main priorities in life can be put on hold. School, family, and/or your job (The most crucial things in your life) are put at risk due to irrational decision making. The growth mindset however, makes the mind think through the negative emotions they show up to work although they're going through the worst breakup or they're having a bad day. They know the emotions will pass whereas your responsibilities won't. Dr Susan dweck did a study on young children by giving them challenging puzzles and tests to solve. The children with the growth mindset looked forward to the challenge whereas the children with the fixed mindset dreaded the thought of a challenge. Challenges are my least favorite also. Why? Because I fear failure also.
Why though?!?! You learn from failures and progress. You truly learn from mistakes. A matter of fact I can truely say-- almost mistake ive made has made me *smarter* ahahaha.  So wrapping up this post, that's really all I have to say... I don't have a happy ending, it's just a summary of  me and what i need to work on.

~ Lauren Jay
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